Let’s talk about the thrill of the thing you say you don’t want.

The chaos.
The fear.
The edge.

That thing you keep manifesting on repeat?
You love it.
Some secret, electric part of you lives for it.

For me, it was the fear of losing everything.
Being homeless.
Not paying my bills.
Driving without insurance.
Living on the verge.

And if I’m being honest?
I loved being held hostage by it.

That full-body panic… followed by the high of getting rescued?
It was my favorite drug.
It made me feel alive.
Like I mattered.
Like something bigger might finally come in and save me.

Until I decided to stop waiting for a rescue.
To stop pretending I hated what I was actually choosing.

When I accepted what I couldn’t pay, when I let the phone get shut off, when I drove like a ghost between worlds with no insurance and no plan — I didn’t fall apart.

I lit up.

I delighted in being unreachable.
I loved the idea of fitting my whole life into a car.
I thrilled at the simplicity of shedding the things I never really owned.

And you know what else?

I love paying my bills.
I love getting paid for work that moves people.
I love the feeling of money landing because my medicine matters.

These things seem to contradict — but in me, they coexist.

The moment I stopped resisting the mess and started owning all of it — every wild, contradictory, turn-on of a truth — I became rich.

Rich in self.
Rich in energy.
Rich in power.
Rich in choice.

This is what lives inside The Rich Witch on Patreon.

If you’re ready to reclaim your shadow desires, your financial truth, your freedom to want all of it — this is where we begin.

[👉 Step into The Rich Witch on Patreon]